Sunlight

I always hate it when I leave my colour shirts shun by the sunlight.
it faded couple of my other shirts already in the past. And left me
with a very unsatisfied look on myface.

This time the sulight left me something else, in my mind.

Crap Crap Crap. I don't know how to put this.
I so don't know how to handle this. Like one moment,
the sun was emphasizing everything that I was seeing,
and then the next thing you know, they all start to fade.
The sun still refuses to look away. It's still burning with a
passion to heat everything up on earth. I don't think anyone
can go up to the sun and turn the heat down to a min.
But I think it's time where someone should do it. I think it
has to be me. at some point.

I try to create this scene in my head, and it just looks
horrible. I am the bad guy, making everything depressed,
depressing and ruining this one person's life. But I don't
want to lie anymore. I don't think I can get deeper in the water
but I know for sure that I'm already rising up to the shallow end.
I feel really really bad. I don't know what to do. I don't know
how to put it. and I definately don't want to face the
consequence of dealing everything around this situation.

I don't want to be labeled as the heart stabber.
Wound maker.